{"id":597,"date":"2016-11-05T23:27:27","date_gmt":"2016-11-05T23:27:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/suny-monroecc-hed110\/?post_type=chapter&#038;p=597"},"modified":"2016-11-27T19:24:49","modified_gmt":"2016-11-27T19:24:49","slug":"protect-yourself-from-relationship-violence","status":"publish","type":"chapter","link":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/chapter\/protect-yourself-from-relationship-violence\/","title":{"raw":"Protecting Yourself from Relationship Violence","rendered":"Protecting Yourself from Relationship Violence"},"content":{"raw":"<div id=\"the-basics\" class=\"topic_area\">\r\n<div class=\"pages\">\r\n<div id=\"page_777\" class=\"page\">\r\n\r\nIt can be hard to know if your relationship is headed down the wrong path. While it\u2019s not always possible to prevent relationship violence, there are steps you can take to protect yourself.\r\n\r\nIf you think your partner might be controlling or abusive, it's important to:\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>Trust your feelings. If something doesn\u2019t seem right, take it seriously.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Learn the warning signs of someone who might become controlling or\u00a0violent.<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Get help. Talk to experts in relationship violence.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\nIf your partner is controlling or abusive, it\u2019s better to get help now than to wait. Controlling or violent relationships usually get worse over\u00a0time.\r\n\r\nRemember: if your partner hurts you, it\u2019s not your fault.\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div id=\"page_778\" class=\"page\">\r\n<h3>What is relationship violence?<\/h3>\r\nRelationship violence is when one person in a relationship is abusive or controlling toward the other person \u2013 especially when they disagree about something.\r\n\r\nRelationship violence is sometimes called dating violence, <strong>domestic violence<\/strong>, or <strong>intimate partner violence<\/strong>. In some relationships, both partners act in abusive or controlling ways.\r\n\r\nWhen many people think about relationship violence, they think about physical violence, like hitting or pushing. But people can also use other methods, like threats or insults, to control their partners.\r\n\r\nRelationship violence can include:\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>Physical violence, like pushing, hitting, or throwing things<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Sexual violence, like forcing or trying to force someone to do something sexual<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Threats of physical or sexual violence, which may include threatening to hurt another person or a pet<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Emotional abuse, like embarrassing a partner or keeping that person away from family and friends<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\nIf you feel controlled by or afraid of your partner \u2013 even if you haven\u2019t been hurt physically \u2013 trust yourself. There are people who can help you figure out what to do\u00a0next.\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div id=\"page_780\" class=\"page\">\r\n<h3>How do I know if my relationship might become violent?<\/h3>\r\nRelationship violence can start slowly and be hard to recognize at first. For example, when people first start dating, it\u2019s common to want to spend a lot of time together. But spending less time with other people can also be a sign that\u00a0your partner is trying to control your time.\r\n\r\nTry asking yourself these questions:\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>Does my partner respect me?<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Does my partner blame me for everything that goes wrong?<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Does my partner make most of the decisions in our relationship?<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Am I ever afraid to tell my partner something?<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Do I ever feel forced to do things that I don't want to do?<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Have I ever done anything sexual with my partner when I didn\u2019t want to?<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Does my partner promise to change and then keep doing the same things?<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\nGet more information about\u00a0the <a id=\"anch_47\" href=\"http:\/\/www.womenshealth.gov\/violence-against-women\/am-i-being-abused\/index.html#a\" target=\"_blank\">signs of abusive relationships<\/a>.\r\n<h3>What if I\u2019m not sure if my relationship is violent?<\/h3>\r\nIt\u2019s okay if you aren't sure \u2013 you can still get help. Domestic violence agencies have counselors who are experts at helping people with questions about their relationships. You don\u2019t even have to give your name.\r\n\r\nIf you have questions about your relationship, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7233) or <a id=\"anch_48\" class=\"external_link\" href=\"http:\/\/www.thehotline.org\/what-is-live-chat\/\" target=\"_blank\">chat online with a trained advocate.<\/a>\r\n\r\nIf you are in danger right now, call 911.\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div id=\"take-action\" class=\"topic_area\">\r\n<h2 class=\"topic_area_title\">Take Action!<\/h2>\r\n<div class=\"pages\">\r\n<div id=\"page_783\" class=\"page\">\r\n\r\nIf you think your partner is controlling or abusive, take steps to protect yourself.\r\n<h3>Trust your instincts.<\/h3>\r\nYou are the expert on your life and relationships. If you think your relationship is unhealthy or you are worried about your safety, trust your gut.\r\n<h3>Plan for your safety.<\/h3>\r\nIf you are in a relationship with someone who is violent or might become violent, make a plan to keep yourself safe. This is important whether you are planning to leave your partner or not.\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div id=\"page_785\" class=\"page\">\r\n<h3>Start with a phone call.<\/h3>\r\nIf you need help or have questions about your relationship, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7233). You'll be able to find a domestic violence\u00a0agency near you or talk to a counselor over the phone.\u00a0<strong>If you are in danger right now, call 911.<\/strong>\r\n<h4>What kind of help can I get?<\/h4>\r\nDomestic violence agencies provide:\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>Emotional support<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Safety planning<\/li>\r\n \t<li>A safe place to stay in an emergency<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Legal help<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Help with housing<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<h4>What about cost?<\/h4>\r\nDomestic violence agencies offer free services, like hotlines, counseling, and help finding resources such as housing or lawyers.\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>","rendered":"<div id=\"the-basics\" class=\"topic_area\">\n<div class=\"pages\">\n<div id=\"page_777\" class=\"page\">\n<p>It can be hard to know if your relationship is headed down the wrong path. While it\u2019s not always possible to prevent relationship violence, there are steps you can take to protect yourself.<\/p>\n<p>If you think your partner might be controlling or abusive, it&#8217;s important to:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Trust your feelings. If something doesn\u2019t seem right, take it seriously.<\/li>\n<li>Learn the warning signs of someone who might become controlling or\u00a0violent.<\/li>\n<li>Get help. Talk to experts in relationship violence.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>If your partner is controlling or abusive, it\u2019s better to get help now than to wait. Controlling or violent relationships usually get worse over\u00a0time.<\/p>\n<p>Remember: if your partner hurts you, it\u2019s not your fault.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div id=\"page_778\" class=\"page\">\n<h3>What is relationship violence?<\/h3>\n<p>Relationship violence is when one person in a relationship is abusive or controlling toward the other person \u2013 especially when they disagree about something.<\/p>\n<p>Relationship violence is sometimes called dating violence, <strong>domestic violence<\/strong>, or <strong>intimate partner violence<\/strong>. In some relationships, both partners act in abusive or controlling ways.<\/p>\n<p>When many people think about relationship violence, they think about physical violence, like hitting or pushing. But people can also use other methods, like threats or insults, to control their partners.<\/p>\n<p>Relationship violence can include:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Physical violence, like pushing, hitting, or throwing things<\/li>\n<li>Sexual violence, like forcing or trying to force someone to do something sexual<\/li>\n<li>Threats of physical or sexual violence, which may include threatening to hurt another person or a pet<\/li>\n<li>Emotional abuse, like embarrassing a partner or keeping that person away from family and friends<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>If you feel controlled by or afraid of your partner \u2013 even if you haven\u2019t been hurt physically \u2013 trust yourself. There are people who can help you figure out what to do\u00a0next.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div id=\"page_780\" class=\"page\">\n<h3>How do I know if my relationship might become violent?<\/h3>\n<p>Relationship violence can start slowly and be hard to recognize at first. For example, when people first start dating, it\u2019s common to want to spend a lot of time together. But spending less time with other people can also be a sign that\u00a0your partner is trying to control your time.<\/p>\n<p>Try asking yourself these questions:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Does my partner respect me?<\/li>\n<li>Does my partner blame me for everything that goes wrong?<\/li>\n<li>Does my partner make most of the decisions in our relationship?<\/li>\n<li>Am I ever afraid to tell my partner something?<\/li>\n<li>Do I ever feel forced to do things that I don&#8217;t want to do?<\/li>\n<li>Have I ever done anything sexual with my partner when I didn\u2019t want to?<\/li>\n<li>Does my partner promise to change and then keep doing the same things?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Get more information about\u00a0the <a id=\"anch_47\" href=\"http:\/\/www.womenshealth.gov\/violence-against-women\/am-i-being-abused\/index.html#a\" target=\"_blank\">signs of abusive relationships<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h3>What if I\u2019m not sure if my relationship is violent?<\/h3>\n<p>It\u2019s okay if you aren&#8217;t sure \u2013 you can still get help. Domestic violence agencies have counselors who are experts at helping people with questions about their relationships. You don\u2019t even have to give your name.<\/p>\n<p>If you have questions about your relationship, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7233) or <a id=\"anch_48\" class=\"external_link\" href=\"http:\/\/www.thehotline.org\/what-is-live-chat\/\" target=\"_blank\">chat online with a trained advocate.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>If you are in danger right now, call 911.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div id=\"take-action\" class=\"topic_area\">\n<h2 class=\"topic_area_title\">Take Action!<\/h2>\n<div class=\"pages\">\n<div id=\"page_783\" class=\"page\">\n<p>If you think your partner is controlling or abusive, take steps to protect yourself.<\/p>\n<h3>Trust your instincts.<\/h3>\n<p>You are the expert on your life and relationships. If you think your relationship is unhealthy or you are worried about your safety, trust your gut.<\/p>\n<h3>Plan for your safety.<\/h3>\n<p>If you are in a relationship with someone who is violent or might become violent, make a plan to keep yourself safe. This is important whether you are planning to leave your partner or not.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div id=\"page_785\" class=\"page\">\n<h3>Start with a phone call.<\/h3>\n<p>If you need help or have questions about your relationship, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7233). You&#8217;ll be able to find a domestic violence\u00a0agency near you or talk to a counselor over the phone.\u00a0<strong>If you are in danger right now, call 911.<\/strong><\/p>\n<h4>What kind of help can I get?<\/h4>\n<p>Domestic violence agencies provide:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Emotional support<\/li>\n<li>Safety planning<\/li>\n<li>A safe place to stay in an emergency<\/li>\n<li>Legal help<\/li>\n<li>Help with housing<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4>What about cost?<\/h4>\n<p>Domestic violence agencies offer free services, like hotlines, counseling, and help finding resources such as housing or lawyers.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\t\t\t <section class=\"citations-section\" role=\"contentinfo\">\n\t\t\t <h3>Candela Citations<\/h3>\n\t\t\t\t\t <div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t <div id=\"citation-list-597\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t <div class=\"licensing\"><div class=\"license-attribution-dropdown-subheading\">Public domain content<\/div><ul class=\"citation-list\"><li>Take Steps to Protect Yourself from Relationship Violence . <strong>Authored by<\/strong>: healthfinder.gov. <strong>Provided by<\/strong>: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. <strong>Located at<\/strong>: <a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/healthfinder.gov\/HealthTopics\/Category\/everyday-healthy-living\/mental-health-and-relationship\/take-steps-to-protect-yourself-from-relationship-violence#the-basics_4\">https:\/\/healthfinder.gov\/HealthTopics\/Category\/everyday-healthy-living\/mental-health-and-relationship\/take-steps-to-protect-yourself-from-relationship-violence#the-basics_4<\/a>. <strong>License<\/strong>: <em><a target=\"_blank\" rel=\"license\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/about\/pdm\">Public Domain: No Known Copyright<\/a><\/em><\/li><\/ul><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t <\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t <\/div>\n\t\t\t <\/section>","protected":false},"author":375,"menu_order":5,"template":"","meta":{"_candela_citation":"[{\"type\":\"pd\",\"description\":\"Take Steps to Protect Yourself from Relationship Violence \",\"author\":\"healthfinder.gov\",\"organization\":\"U.S. Department of Health and Human Services\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/healthfinder.gov\/HealthTopics\/Category\/everyday-healthy-living\/mental-health-and-relationship\/take-steps-to-protect-yourself-from-relationship-violence#the-basics_4\",\"project\":\"\",\"license\":\"pd\",\"license_terms\":\"\"}]","CANDELA_OUTCOMES_GUID":"","pb_show_title":"on","pb_short_title":"","pb_subtitle":"","pb_authors":[],"pb_section_license":""},"chapter-type":[],"contributor":[],"license":[],"class_list":["post-597","chapter","type-chapter","status-publish","hentry"],"part":260,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/597","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/chapter"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/375"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/597\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":824,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/597\/revisions\/824"}],"part":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/parts\/260"}],"metadata":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/597\/metadata\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=597"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"chapter-type","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapter-type?post=597"},{"taxonomy":"contributor","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/contributor?post=597"},{"taxonomy":"license","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/atd-monroecc-healthed\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/license?post=597"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}