The Family Through Time – Life Cycles
The Family Life Cycle is the fourth component of the Family System’s Theory. These are developmental changes that occur in families over time. The family with its varying patterns of boundary organization, rules, roles, power distribution, and communication processes, also passes through a life cycle with certain identifiable stages. Each stage presents the family as a unit with new tasks. Each stage means considerable change for the family during transition from one stage to the next. The transitions associated with moving from one stage to another have come to be considered normal and sometimes stressful parts of development. The amount of stress experienced by a specific family during these transitions varies and depends upon many factors.
The transition points experienced by most nuclear families are outlined in the following framework. This framework is primarily applicable to nuclear families. There are variants in other kinds of families.
Family Life Cycle:
- CommitmentTasks:
- Assume spouse roles
- Separate from family of origin
- Establish relationship with in-laws
- Establish rules of interaction (intimacy/distance)
- Divide work
- Developing New Parent RolesTasks:
- Assume parent roles, expectation, values, etc.
- Assume child-rearing responsibility
- Negotiate changes in work, recreation, housing, relationships with extended family
- Establish rules and communications regarding children (intimacy/distance)
- Accepting the new PersonalityTasks:
- Continue development of parental roles
- Allow development of new individual
- Relate to developing personality
- Make new space arrangements
- Introducing the Child to Institutions Outside the FamilyTasks:
- Expand parental roles
- Support child’s first separation
- Accept child’s developing autonomy and accept changes in family organization
- Relate to outside institutions i.e., schools, church, sports, etc.
- Accepting AdolescenceTasks:
- Deal with emerging sexual identity of child
- Accept increasing influence of peer group
- Promote differentiation and autonomy of child
- Experimenting with IndependenceTasks:
- Deal with increased striving for independence
- Facilitate greater participation – child in decision making
- Participate in education and career planning
- Accept lessening of the tie to the family or origin
- Preparing to LaunchTasks:
- Accept independent adult role of child
- Plan for separation
- Face own middle age transition issue
- Letting Go/Facing Each Other AgainTasks:
- Rework spouse roles
- Face unresolved issues of the past
- Work out separation issues around children
- Accepting Retirement/Old AgeTasks:
- Develop role transitions and new life style
- Develop activities other than work and family responsibilities
- Face physical and emotional problems of aging
- Deal with significant losses
- Begin life review
Variations in Life Cycle
The family life cycles and the issues involved can vary a great deal depending upon cultural and ethnic differences and upon the circumstances of the individuals involved. For instance, a family in which there has been a divorce has all of the issues of separation and loss to deal with. The family essentially faces a transition from a two-parent to a one-parent family, even though there may still be involvement of both parents. The blended family, of which there are many these days, goes through a process of trying to “fit” together two family systems. The formation stages as well as latter stages can vary for these families. The couple who has never had children will face different transitions and issues than families with children.
The cultural variations in the family life cycle are great. For example, the Mexican-American life cycle is more clearly “three-generational” than the Anglo-American life cycle. Extended family members, friends, and neighbors usually play a strong role in the family life. Older members of the extended family are respected, and age is a determinant of power and control. Families tend to be protective of their members and to prize family loyalty. Ideas about when and under what circumstances young people leave home are different from middle class Anglo-American ideas.
The life stages and tasks of the single-parent family are similar to those of any family, with the exception of those that relate to couples. The single-parent family may face problems of task overload at various stages of the life cycle unless there are adequate support systems available. Other variations would include gay and lesbian couples and the stresses they may experience in their life stages and tasks. Obviously, the family life cycle must be considered in a socio-cultural content.
Families are Multi-Generational Systems
The family life cycle is not the only way in which the time dimension is important in understanding families. A family may seem to consist of only two or three current generations. It is actually greatly influenced by many past generations. It is important to understand the linkages, or lack of them, between the current family and extended family members. Values, expectations, myths, secrets, and unresolved issues around important events are transmitted from one generation to the next. This can be a powerful influence in the context of the present family and its individual members. There is an assumption here that all people, whether consciously or unconsciously, are deeply enmeshed in their family systems. The family system affects people’s perceptions of who they are, how they think and communicate, and how they see themselves and others. It influences what they choose to do and be, whom they choose to be with, love, and marry. It influences how they choose to structure their new family.
Early in the life cycle, every family must make decisions about how it will relate to families of origin. How will a newly married couple relate to their own and to each other’s family. For many families this can be an area of great conflict that persists over the years. Sometimes there are damaging cut-offs that divide families and limit opportunities for contact and support. The extended family can be a source of support, nurturance, and stimulation and an extremely important resource. It is essential for anyone trying to understand families to pay special attention to the intergenerational facet of family life and to understand that some of the most important people may not be current family.
The Single Parent Family
The need to be sensitive to the variety of family structures and life styles that are acceptable and functional in American society today was noted earlier. The assumption tends to exist that a family contains two parents. Yet, it is now estimated that nearly one half of all the children in the United States today will spend at least part of their lives in single-parent families. Currently, one family in five is headed by single parents. There is no question that, for a variety of reasons, the single-parent family has become almost commonplace.
