{"id":407,"date":"2016-03-31T17:58:50","date_gmt":"2016-03-31T17:58:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/waymaker-level1-english\/?post_type=chapter&p=407"},"modified":"2017-01-05T19:24:09","modified_gmt":"2017-01-05T19:24:09","slug":"outcome-revising","status":"publish","type":"chapter","link":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/suny-mcc-college-composition\/chapter\/outcome-revising\/","title":{"raw":"Revising","rendered":"Revising"},"content":{"raw":"

Introduction<\/h2>\r\n
\r\n

Learning Objectives<\/h3>\r\n
    \r\n \t
  • identify the process of seeking input on writing from others<\/li>\r\n \t
  • identify strategies for incorporating personal and external editorial comments<\/li>\r\n \t
  • identify methods for re-seeing a piece of writing<\/li>\r\n \t
  • identify higher order concerns for revision<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<\/div>\r\nTaken literally, revision is re-vision -- literally re-seeing the paper in front of you.\r\n\r\nThe act of revision centers heavily around the practice of questioning your work. \u00a0As you read through this section, and consider your own habits when it comes to revision, consider this list of guiding questions from The Writing Center at UNC-Chapel Hill.\r\n
    \r\n

    Revision Checklist<\/h2>\r\n

    \"GraphicSubject, Audience, Purpose<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\r\n
      \r\n \t
    1. What\u2019s the most important thing I want to say about my subject?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
    2. Who am I writing this paper for? What would my reader want to know about the subject? What does my reader already know about it?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
    3. Why do I think the subject is worth writing about? Will my reader think the paper was worth reading?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
    4. What verb explains what I\u2019m trying to do in this paper (tell a story, compare X and Y, describe Z)?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
    5. Does my first paragraph answer questions 1-4? If not, why not?<\/span><\/li>\r\n<\/ol>\r\n

      Organization<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\r\n
        \r\n \t
      1. How many specific points do I make about my subject? Did I overlap or repeat any points? Did I leave my points out or add some that aren\u2019t relevant to the main idea?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
      2. How many paragraphs did I use to talk about each point?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
      3. Why did I talk about them in this order? Should the order be changed?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
      4. How did I get from one point to the next? What signposts did I give the reader?<\/span><\/li>\r\n<\/ol>\r\n

        Paragraphing (Ask these questions of every paragraph)<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\r\n
          \r\n \t
        1. What job is this paragraph supposed to do? How does it relate to the paragraph before and after it?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
        2. What\u2019s the topic idea? Will my reader have trouble finding it?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
        3. How many sentences did it take to develop the topic idea? Can I substitute better examples, reasons, or details?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
        4. How well does the paragraph hold together? How many levels of generality does it have? Are the sentences different lengths and types? Do I need transitions? When I read the paragraph out loud, did it flow smoothly?<\/span><\/li>\r\n<\/ol>\r\n

          Sentences (Ask these questions of every sentence)<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\r\n
            \r\n \t
          1. Which sentences in my paper do I like the most? The least?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
          2. Can my reader \u201csee\u201d what I\u2019m saying? What words could I substitute for people, things, this\/that, aspect, etc.?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
          3. Is this sentence \u201cfat\u201d?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
          4. Can I combine this sentence with another one?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
          5. Can I add adjectives and adverbs or find a more lively verb?<\/span><\/li>\r\n<\/ol>\r\n

            Things to Check Last<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\r\n
              \r\n \t
            1. Did I check spelling and punctuation? What kinds of grammar or punctuation problems did I have in my last paper?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
            2. How does my paper end? Did I keep the promises I made to my reader at the beginning of the paper?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
            3. When I read the assignment again, did I miss anything?<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
            4. What do I like best about this paper? What do I need to work on in the next paper?<\/span><\/li>\r\n<\/ol>\r\n

              \u2014 from A Rhetoric for Writing Teachers <\/i>by Erika Lindemann<\/span><\/p>\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n

              \r\n\r\n

              Respond and Redraft<\/h2>\r\nThere are several steps to turn a first (or second, or third!) draft of a piece of writing into the final version. There is no way to get to that wonderful final draft without all the steps in between.\r\n\r\nProfessors often\u00a0ask for draft essays in order to guide you as your writing develops. As you progress from 1st to 2nd draft, or from 2nd (3rd or 4th)\u00a0to final draft, seeking input from others can help you get a fresh perspective on your work.\r\n

              Find a Trusted Reader<\/h3>\r\nA survival tip for college is to develop relationships with people whose opinions you trust. You'll want to be able to draw on these people to give valuable, helpful, supportive feedback on your writing.\r\n\r\n\"WomanAs you first get started with college classes, you'll likely participate in peer reviews for essay assignments. Show your appreciation to your classmates who offer you helpful feedback. Note which of your\u00a0classmates whose writing you admire. Try to continue working with these people as much as possible.\r\n\r\nAlso take advantage of your school's Writing Center, if possible. Most tutoring centers\u00a0will welcome talking with you at any stage of your essay-writing process. Note<\/strong>: tutors won't just \"fix\" a paper draft. They will talk with you about what areas you are concerned with, and offer strategies to help focus YOU as YOU revise your paper.\r\n\r\nFinally, your professor will likely be happy to talk over a draft with you, as well. Some classes will require you to turn in a rough draft for a grade and instructor comments, but most won't. Nonetheless, your professors expect you to write multiple drafts, and will welcome a visit during office hours to talk about how to make your paper as strong as it can possibly be.\r\n

              Respond to your reader\u2019s comments<\/strong><\/h3>\r\nWhether you received comments from your professor, your friends, or a peer review, your edits are a way to respond\u00a0<\/em>to their questions and comments. Was your reader confused by what you thought was a really good point? Edit your paragraph so that your idea becomes clearer. Use specific pieces of evidence, such an important quote or statistic, to strengthen the paragraph. You can even try responding to the comments aloud\u2013and then write them down in your draft in appropriately \u201cacademic\u201d language.\r\n

              Redraft your essay<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n\"AReally going from draft to final version requires rethinking the flow of logic in your writing. For instance, you might realize that a sentence\u00a0buried on the 3rd page of your paper would be an excellent \"hook.\" To use it well, you will need to redraft, moving it to the opening and altering the rest of the material on page 3 as well.\r\n\r\nRedrafting means looking again at how each piece of your argument fits together in the whole.\r\n
                \r\n \t
              • Shift paragraphs around\u2013don\u2019t worry about losing your train of thought.<\/li>\r\n \t
              • Delete unnecessary information\u2013or if you think it fits better elsewhere, re-place it.<\/li>\r\n \t
              • Outlining your paper as it stands in the current draft can be very helpful for figuring out how you are presenting your ideas and can make it much easier to see where you need to reorder your information, add more support, or delete unnecessary material.<\/li>\r\n \t
              • If you are a visual person, try a\u00a0craftsy approach. Print your essay out (single-sided) and cut it into paragraph-long pieces. Shuffle the pieces around so that you\u2019ve mixed up their original order entirely. Then individually read and place the pieces\/paragraph in the order that the ideas connect. As you tape or pin the parts together, you might find that the paragraphs are coming together in different ways than in your original draft.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n\r\n
                \r\n\r\n

                Higher Order Concerns<\/h2>\r\nYou\u2019ve written a draft of your paper. \u00a0Now your work is done, so you should just\u00a0turn it in, right? \u00a0No, WAIT!\u00a0\u00a0Step away from the computer, take a deep breath, and don\u2019t submit that assignment just yet.\r\n\r\nYou should always revise and proofread your paper. \u00a0A first draft is usually a very rough draft. \u00a0It takes time and at least two\u00a0(or more!) additional<\/strong> \"Drawingpasses through to really make sure your argument is strong, your writing is polished, and there are no typos or grammatical errors. \u00a0Making these efforts\u00a0will always give you a better paper in the end.\r\n\r\nTry to wait a day or two before looking back over your paper. \u00a0If you are on a tight deadline, then take a walk, grab a snack, drink some coffee, or do something else to clear your head so you can read through your paper with fresh eyes. \u00a0The longer you wait, the more likely it is you will see what is actually on the page and not what you meant to write.\r\n

                What to Look for in the First Pass(es): Higher-Order\u00a0Concerns<\/strong><\/h3>\r\nTypically, early review\u00a0passes of a paper should focus on the larger issues, which are known as higher-order concerns<\/strong>. Higher-order concerns relate to the strength of your ideas, the support for your argument, and the logic of how your points are presented. Some important higher-order concerns\u00a0are listed below, along with\u00a0some questions you can ask yourself while proofreading diting\u00a0to see if your paper needs work in any of these areas:\r\n
                  \r\n \t
                • The Thesis Statement:\u00a0<\/strong>\r\n
                    \r\n \t
                  • Does your paper have a clear thesis statement? If so, where is it? <\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
                  • Does the introduction lead up to that thesis statement? <\/span><\/li>\r\n \t
                  • Does each paragraph directly relate back to your thesis statement?<\/span><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<\/li>\r\n \t
                  • The Argument:\u00a0<\/strong>\r\n
                      \r\n \t
                    • Is your thesis statement supported by enough evidence?<\/li>\r\n \t
                    • Do you need to add any explanations or examples to better make your case?<\/li>\r\n \t
                    • Is there any unnecessary or irrelevant information that should be removed?<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<\/li>\r\n \t
                    • Large-Scale Organization:<\/strong>\r\n
                        \r\n \t
                      • Could your paper be easily outlined or tree-diagrammed?<\/li>\r\n \t
                      • Are your paragraphs\u00a0presented in a logical order?<\/li>\r\n \t
                      • Are similar ideas grouped together?<\/li>\r\n \t
                      • Are there clear transitions (either verbal or logical) that link each paragraph to what came before?<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<\/li>\r\n \t
                      • Organization within Paragraphs:<\/strong>\r\n
                          \r\n \t
                        • Is each paragraph centered around one main idea?<\/li>\r\n \t
                        • Is there a clear topic sentence for each paragraph?<\/li>\r\n \t
                        • Are\u00a0any of\u00a0your paragraphs too short or too long?<\/li>\r\n \t
                        • Do all the sentences in each paragraph relate back to their respective topic sentences?<\/li>\r\n \t
                        • Are the sentences presented in a logical order, so each grows out of what came before?<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<\/li>\r\n \t
                        • \"printedThe Assignment Instructions:<\/strong>\r\n
                            \r\n \t
                          • Does your paper answer\u00a0all aspects of the writing prompt?<\/li>\r\n \t
                          • Have you completed all of the tasks required by the instructor?<\/li>\r\n \t
                          • Did you include all necessary sections (for example, an abstract or reference list)?<\/li>\r\n \t
                          • Are you following the required style for formatting the paper as a whole, the reference list, and\/or your citations? (That last question is technically a lower-order concern, but it falls under the assignment instructions and is something where you could easily lose points if you don\u2019t follow instructions.)<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\nWhen reading through your early draft(s) of your paper, mark up your paper with those concerns in mind first. \u00a0Keep revising until you have fixed all\u00a0of these larger-scale issues.\r\n\r\nYour paper may change a lot as you do this \u2013 that\u2019s completely normal!\r\n\r\nYou might have to add more material; cut sentences, paragraphs, or even whole sections; or rewrite significant portions of the paper to fix any problems related to these higher-order concerns. \u00a0This is why you should be careful not\u00a0to get too bogged down with\u00a0small-scale problems early on: there is no point in spending a lot of time fixing sentences that you end up cutting because they don\u2019t actually fit in with your topic.<\/strong>\r\n\r\n
                            \r\n\r\n

                            Self-Check<\/h2>\r\nhttps:\/\/assessments.lumenlearning.com\/assessments\/1264","rendered":"

                            Introduction<\/h2>\n
                            \n

                            Learning Objectives<\/h3>\n
                              \n
                            • identify the process of seeking input on writing from others<\/li>\n
                            • identify strategies for incorporating personal and external editorial comments<\/li>\n
                            • identify methods for re-seeing a piece of writing<\/li>\n
                            • identify higher order concerns for revision<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n

                              Taken literally, revision is re-vision — literally re-seeing the paper in front of you.<\/p>\n

                              The act of revision centers heavily around the practice of questioning your work. \u00a0As you read through this section, and consider your own habits when it comes to revision, consider this list of guiding questions from The Writing Center at UNC-Chapel Hill.<\/p>\n

                              \n

                              Revision Checklist<\/h2>\n

                              \"GraphicSubject, Audience, Purpose<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n
                                \n
                              1. What\u2019s the most important thing I want to say about my subject?<\/span><\/li>\n
                              2. Who am I writing this paper for? What would my reader want to know about the subject? What does my reader already know about it?<\/span><\/li>\n
                              3. Why do I think the subject is worth writing about? Will my reader think the paper was worth reading?<\/span><\/li>\n
                              4. What verb explains what I\u2019m trying to do in this paper (tell a story, compare X and Y, describe Z)?<\/span><\/li>\n
                              5. Does my first paragraph answer questions 1-4? If not, why not?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                                Organization<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n
                                  \n
                                1. How many specific points do I make about my subject? Did I overlap or repeat any points? Did I leave my points out or add some that aren\u2019t relevant to the main idea?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                2. How many paragraphs did I use to talk about each point?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                3. Why did I talk about them in this order? Should the order be changed?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                4. How did I get from one point to the next? What signposts did I give the reader?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                                  Paragraphing (Ask these questions of every paragraph)<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n
                                    \n
                                  1. What job is this paragraph supposed to do? How does it relate to the paragraph before and after it?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                  2. What\u2019s the topic idea? Will my reader have trouble finding it?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                  3. How many sentences did it take to develop the topic idea? Can I substitute better examples, reasons, or details?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                  4. How well does the paragraph hold together? How many levels of generality does it have? Are the sentences different lengths and types? Do I need transitions? When I read the paragraph out loud, did it flow smoothly?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                                    Sentences (Ask these questions of every sentence)<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n
                                      \n
                                    1. Which sentences in my paper do I like the most? The least?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                    2. Can my reader \u201csee\u201d what I\u2019m saying? What words could I substitute for people, things, this\/that, aspect, etc.?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                    3. Is this sentence \u201cfat\u201d?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                    4. Can I combine this sentence with another one?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                    5. Can I add adjectives and adverbs or find a more lively verb?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                                      Things to Check Last<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n
                                        \n
                                      1. Did I check spelling and punctuation? What kinds of grammar or punctuation problems did I have in my last paper?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                      2. How does my paper end? Did I keep the promises I made to my reader at the beginning of the paper?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                      3. When I read the assignment again, did I miss anything?<\/span><\/li>\n
                                      4. What do I like best about this paper? What do I need to work on in the next paper?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                                        \u2014 from A Rhetoric for Writing Teachers <\/i>by Erika Lindemann<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

                                        \n

                                        Respond and Redraft<\/h2>\n

                                        There are several steps to turn a first (or second, or third!) draft of a piece of writing into the final version. There is no way to get to that wonderful final draft without all the steps in between.<\/p>\n

                                        Professors often\u00a0ask for draft essays in order to guide you as your writing develops. As you progress from 1st to 2nd draft, or from 2nd (3rd or 4th)\u00a0to final draft, seeking input from others can help you get a fresh perspective on your work.<\/p>\n

                                        Find a Trusted Reader<\/h3>\n

                                        A survival tip for college is to develop relationships with people whose opinions you trust. You’ll want to be able to draw on these people to give valuable, helpful, supportive feedback on your writing.<\/p>\n

                                        \"WomanAs you first get started with college classes, you’ll likely participate in peer reviews for essay assignments. Show your appreciation to your classmates who offer you helpful feedback. Note which of your\u00a0classmates whose writing you admire. Try to continue working with these people as much as possible.<\/p>\n

                                        Also take advantage of your school’s Writing Center, if possible. Most tutoring centers\u00a0will welcome talking with you at any stage of your essay-writing process. Note<\/strong>: tutors won’t just “fix” a paper draft. They will talk with you about what areas you are concerned with, and offer strategies to help focus YOU as YOU revise your paper.<\/p>\n

                                        Finally, your professor will likely be happy to talk over a draft with you, as well. Some classes will require you to turn in a rough draft for a grade and instructor comments, but most won’t. Nonetheless, your professors expect you to write multiple drafts, and will welcome a visit during office hours to talk about how to make your paper as strong as it can possibly be.<\/p>\n

                                        Respond to your reader\u2019s comments<\/strong><\/h3>\n

                                        Whether you received comments from your professor, your friends, or a peer review, your edits are a way to respond\u00a0<\/em>to their questions and comments. Was your reader confused by what you thought was a really good point? Edit your paragraph so that your idea becomes clearer. Use specific pieces of evidence, such an important quote or statistic, to strengthen the paragraph. You can even try responding to the comments aloud\u2013and then write them down in your draft in appropriately \u201cacademic\u201d language.<\/p>\n

                                        Redraft your essay<\/strong><\/h3>\n

                                        \"AReally going from draft to final version requires rethinking the flow of logic in your writing. For instance, you might realize that a sentence\u00a0buried on the 3rd page of your paper would be an excellent “hook.” To use it well, you will need to redraft, moving it to the opening and altering the rest of the material on page 3 as well.<\/p>\n

                                        Redrafting means looking again at how each piece of your argument fits together in the whole.<\/p>\n

                                          \n
                                        • Shift paragraphs around\u2013don\u2019t worry about losing your train of thought.<\/li>\n
                                        • Delete unnecessary information\u2013or if you think it fits better elsewhere, re-place it.<\/li>\n
                                        • Outlining your paper as it stands in the current draft can be very helpful for figuring out how you are presenting your ideas and can make it much easier to see where you need to reorder your information, add more support, or delete unnecessary material.<\/li>\n
                                        • If you are a visual person, try a\u00a0craftsy approach. Print your essay out (single-sided) and cut it into paragraph-long pieces. Shuffle the pieces around so that you\u2019ve mixed up their original order entirely. Then individually read and place the pieces\/paragraph in the order that the ideas connect. As you tape or pin the parts together, you might find that the paragraphs are coming together in different ways than in your original draft.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
                                          \n

                                          Higher Order Concerns<\/h2>\n

                                          You\u2019ve written a draft of your paper. \u00a0Now your work is done, so you should just\u00a0turn it in, right? \u00a0No, WAIT!\u00a0\u00a0Step away from the computer, take a deep breath, and don\u2019t submit that assignment just yet.<\/p>\n

                                          You should always revise and proofread your paper. \u00a0A first draft is usually a very rough draft. \u00a0It takes time and at least two\u00a0(or more!) additional<\/strong> \"Drawingpasses through to really make sure your argument is strong, your writing is polished, and there are no typos or grammatical errors. \u00a0Making these efforts\u00a0will always give you a better paper in the end.<\/p>\n

                                          Try to wait a day or two before looking back over your paper. \u00a0If you are on a tight deadline, then take a walk, grab a snack, drink some coffee, or do something else to clear your head so you can read through your paper with fresh eyes. \u00a0The longer you wait, the more likely it is you will see what is actually on the page and not what you meant to write.<\/p>\n

                                          What to Look for in the First Pass(es): Higher-Order\u00a0Concerns<\/strong><\/h3>\n

                                          Typically, early review\u00a0passes of a paper should focus on the larger issues, which are known as higher-order concerns<\/strong>. Higher-order concerns relate to the strength of your ideas, the support for your argument, and the logic of how your points are presented. Some important higher-order concerns\u00a0are listed below, along with\u00a0some questions you can ask yourself while proofreading diting\u00a0to see if your paper needs work in any of these areas:<\/p>\n

                                            \n
                                          • The Thesis Statement:\u00a0<\/strong>\n
                                              \n
                                            • Does your paper have a clear thesis statement? If so, where is it? <\/span><\/li>\n
                                            • Does the introduction lead up to that thesis statement? <\/span><\/li>\n
                                            • Does each paragraph directly relate back to your thesis statement?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
                                            • The Argument:\u00a0<\/strong>\n
                                                \n
                                              • Is your thesis statement supported by enough evidence?<\/li>\n
                                              • Do you need to add any explanations or examples to better make your case?<\/li>\n
                                              • Is there any unnecessary or irrelevant information that should be removed?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
                                              • Large-Scale Organization:<\/strong>\n
                                                  \n
                                                • Could your paper be easily outlined or tree-diagrammed?<\/li>\n
                                                • Are your paragraphs\u00a0presented in a logical order?<\/li>\n
                                                • Are similar ideas grouped together?<\/li>\n
                                                • Are there clear transitions (either verbal or logical) that link each paragraph to what came before?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
                                                • Organization within Paragraphs:<\/strong>\n
                                                    \n
                                                  • Is each paragraph centered around one main idea?<\/li>\n
                                                  • Is there a clear topic sentence for each paragraph?<\/li>\n
                                                  • Are\u00a0any of\u00a0your paragraphs too short or too long?<\/li>\n
                                                  • Do all the sentences in each paragraph relate back to their respective topic sentences?<\/li>\n
                                                  • Are the sentences presented in a logical order, so each grows out of what came before?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
                                                  • \"printedThe Assignment Instructions:<\/strong>\n
                                                      \n
                                                    • Does your paper answer\u00a0all aspects of the writing prompt?<\/li>\n
                                                    • Have you completed all of the tasks required by the instructor?<\/li>\n
                                                    • Did you include all necessary sections (for example, an abstract or reference list)?<\/li>\n
                                                    • Are you following the required style for formatting the paper as a whole, the reference list, and\/or your citations? (That last question is technically a lower-order concern, but it falls under the assignment instructions and is something where you could easily lose points if you don\u2019t follow instructions.)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

                                                      When reading through your early draft(s) of your paper, mark up your paper with those concerns in mind first. \u00a0Keep revising until you have fixed all\u00a0of these larger-scale issues.<\/p>\n

                                                      Your paper may change a lot as you do this \u2013 that\u2019s completely normal!<\/p>\n

                                                      You might have to add more material; cut sentences, paragraphs, or even whole sections; or rewrite significant portions of the paper to fix any problems related to these higher-order concerns. \u00a0This is why you should be careful not\u00a0to get too bogged down with\u00a0small-scale problems early on: there is no point in spending a lot of time fixing sentences that you end up cutting because they don\u2019t actually fit in with your topic.<\/strong><\/p>\n

                                                      \n

                                                      Self-Check<\/h2>\n

                                                      \t