{"id":102,"date":"2017-05-04T17:08:30","date_gmt":"2017-05-04T17:08:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/suny-teaching-autoethnography\/chapter\/steel-paradise-the-hardcore-metal-aesthetic\/"},"modified":"2017-05-04T18:21:26","modified_gmt":"2017-05-04T18:21:26","slug":"steel-paradise-the-hardcore-metal-aesthetic","status":"publish","type":"chapter","link":"https:\/\/courses.lumenlearning.com\/suny-teaching-autoethnography\/chapter\/steel-paradise-the-hardcore-metal-aesthetic\/","title":{"raw":"Steel Paradise: The Hardcore Metal Aesthetic","rendered":"Steel Paradise: The Hardcore Metal Aesthetic"},"content":{"raw":"Tony Gorta is the artist for a metal band. He has long red-blond hair, hair that comes down past his shoulders and ends in ringlet curls a hairdresser would spend hours just trying to replicate. He\u2019s thin\u2014wiry almost\u2014and grandly tall, standing at 6\u20194\u201d. His glasses, rimmed with thin wire, slide halfway down his nose and rest there, as though the contours of the fixture were molded just to hold them in place. His eyes are wide and glassy, a gorgeous teal color that\u2019s repeated in his shirt, which is every color. The shirt is pinstriped and buttoned up, evocative of a psychedelic poster. His skin is a chalky white and almost all covered, with the exception of his hands and face. He wears Doc Martens, the kind that only go up to the ankle and could be mistaken for regular dress shoes if not for the signature yellow threading along the outsole. The dark denim of his jeans is patched only in one place, right under the front left pocket, \u201cIt\u2019s because I lit them on fire,\u201d he tells me, for the fourth time. The first time he told me was the night I met him, on the edge of the water on the Upper East Side at four in the morning. The second time was on a subway to Brooklyn, and the third time just a bit earlier this very night in a sparsely populated diner. He\u2019s very proud of the incident, as it\u2019s very edgy to set one\u2019s own pants on fire. He\u2019s even more proud that he sewed up the pants himself. The band that Tony is the artist for is the recently signed Manhattan-based metal band called Steel Paradise. \u201cI met Christian through Moise and I met Moise in high school,\u201d he explains. We\u2019re sitting on a bus stop on a Tuesday night, lit by the passing cars and street lights, and I am asking him questions. \u201cThat was when Moise still had his afro,\u201d he continues, as though I should remember this seemingly important nugget of information that apparently divides Moise\u2019s entire life into Before Afro, During Afro and After Afro. His left arm lays across his lap, fingers curled around a cigarette the way a pencil might be grasped. His legs are crossed and he\u2019s slouched over, just slightly. Tony went to LaGuardia High School for the Arts, where he met a whole slew of eccentric ruffians which he can, and will, talk about for hours. Mostly he likes to talk about the ones that he smoked with before he got arrested, but also he likes to talk about the ones that he gave baby animal themed nicknames to. Moise Scott, who Tony has taken to calling \u201cMouse,\u201d is a muscular 6\u20192\u201d musical performance major who plays drums for Steel Paradise. In high school he played the flute. Christian Realmuto is the lead guitarist of Steel Paradise, and probably the only person I\u2019ve ever met who is taller than Tony. The three of them are a bit frightening upon first glance, but after you\u2019ve seen them talk about baby animals for twenty minutes the hardcore metal aesthetic doesn\u2019t seem quite as intimidating.\r\n\r\nChristian is the center of Steel Paradise, and is thus the center of the local community that has risen around it. Steel Paradise, according to Moise Scott (sans afro), started as a project of Christian\u2019s in middle school. \u201cYeah he was like, \u2018I\u2019m really serious about learning guitar,\u2019\u201d Scott says as he flips a pancake on the stove of his mother\u2019s Washington Heights apartment. He\u2019s making me breakfast while we talk. \u201cAnd I was like, \u2018Yeah, sure, whatever Christian, because I know Christian isn\u2019t serious about shit. But I went along with it and I guess he kind of was because we\u2019re still doing it.\u201d He wrenches the pancake out of the pan and unceremoniously drops it onto an empty ceramic plate. \u201cI knew Christian for a while because he was friends with my best friend in elementary school.\u201d Moise goes on to explain the complex intricacies of elementary school social circles, taking care to explain the weight of the word \u201cbest friend\u201d several times before telling me that they didn\u2019t really become close until they were in high school band together. They both play flute.\r\n\r\nThe band has changed members several times, and several members have left and come back. The members of the band and the friends and fans that have flocked to it have formed a sort of intimate group that participates in activities centered around the band\u2019s performances and events. Not everyone is directly connected to the band, like Tony, who creates all of their promotional art, or Moise, who is a member of the band. The majority of the people in this group are just fans of the band\u2019s music, actively attend their shows, or are associated with other local metal bands that come into contact with Steel Paradise. Members of this small community include a variety of interesting factions, including \u201cChristian\u2019s Neighbors\u201d, \u201cArt Girls from LaGuardia\u201d, \u201cPeople Christian Works with at the Deli\u201d, and \u201cPeople Who Have Dated Someone We Know\u201d, which is probably the largest faction. There is also, always, a small faction of people Steel Paradise is currently dating, the only member of which right now is Emma Montgomery, Christian\u2019s girlfriend.\r\n\r\n\u201cEmma is a saint\u201d Tony tells me, sitting all the way back in his seat and looking upward toward the heavens with an expression of ultimate gratitude. Every time someone says that, which is often, it\u2019s always followed by a story about Christian pissing on something.\r\n\r\n\u201cOne time Christian was pissing on a car and he didn\u2019t check to see if it was empty first\u2014which it wasn\u2019t, there was a family in it\u2014and he\u2019s drunkenly cursing at the top of his lungs and we were all yelling at him and Emma just goes over to him and touches his arm to pull him away\u2014and he just stops!\u201d Tony sighs, leans forward in his seat and kind of smiles, peacefully.Emma has also ignored antics such as the 24\u201d x 36\u201d poster of Megan Fox that is hanging on his wall, his firm stance as a Republican despite his liberal beliefs, his long, uncombed hair, and the fact that his name is also her brother\u2019s name. Emma can stop Christian from doing things that Christian does while he is drunk and for that reason she is the unknowing savior of the Steel Paradise group.\r\n\r\n\u201cEmma is a saint,\u201d Moise says, breathlessly, when asked about the subject. He stares blankly into space for a couple of moments, probably recalling horrors unbeknownst to common folk such as you or I, and lets the pancake currently in the skillet cook slightly past golden-brown before taking it out. I don\u2019t question him further.\u201cThe Steel Paradise Crew,\u201d as Moise refers to the group as, is typically recognizable by their typical metal aesthetic, sporting all sorts of black band t-shirts, double-grommetted belts, lace, wristbands, ripped jeans, and everything obtainable that is black and covered in studs. Other notable clues include Metallica paraphernalia, large, bulky instruments thrown over their backs in black cases, long, tangled, unruly hair, and the repeated use of the phrase popularized by the adult cartoon Metalocolypse, <\/i>\u201cMetal as hell.\u201d There are, however several notable exceptions. Moise, the drummer, likes to wear patterns and bright colors, and is often in athletic-wear and shirts with rappers on them. Tony is usually wearing a colorful button-up, and sometimes what the Art Girls from LaGuardia refer to as \u201cDad clothes,\u201d a pair of thicker-rimmed glasses combined with a tweed jacket that Tony has never been carded in a liquor store while wearing (this is the only reason I have uncovered that explains why they all call him \u201cdad\u201d). My favorite example of this is a smiley, clean-cut boy named Weston who is always wearing salmon-colored, tailored clothing that looks like it\u2019s from a J. Crew catalog. He lives on the Upper East Side and doesn\u2019t like metal music, but seems to enjoy drinking as much as metal kids do.The Steel Paradise shows are most notable for being loud, sticky, and erratic. They typically take place below the ground floor in some hole in the wall, and no matter where it is the same people go every time. Any venue they play in reeks strongly of beer and is dimly lit. The last show they played was in a bar on Lafayette Street with walls painted black and colored lights that reached over the span of the room, flooded the entire scene. The audience wasn\u2019t generously populated, but the male crowd still managed to cause some sort of commotion with a frivolous show of violently throwing themselves into one another in some sort of display of support of the band. This had to be explained to me multiple times and I am still not sure that I can properly articulate its purpose.\r\n\r\nLocal music shows aside, drinking is the most notable Steel Paradise event. Usually this is set in some poor kid\u2019s dirty New York apartment, but it really can happen anywhere and they are not very discriminant about it. Currently, the most frequented place for a Steel Paradise drinking event is the Chelsea Galleries, specifically on Thursdays between six and eight when free wine is given out.\r\n\r\n\u201cI think this is about how life always changes,\u201d Moise says, looking quizzically at a painting. It\u2019s a series of smudged paint strokes that don\u2019t really seem to form much of anything at all. We are on a 25th Street gallery and he has one cup of free\u2014presumably Trader Joe\u2019s\u2014wine that the studio is giving out, in each hand. He\u2019s trying very hard to seem interested in the art. \u201cAnd about old people. And death probably.\u201d He notices his empty glass and, abruptly ending his analysis, goes back to the wine table. I am treated with these gorgeous, half-assed analyses all night. \u201cI think this is about sex,\u201d he says, looking at a black and white photo of just an erect penis. \u201cAnd about how it\u2019s art. Is there only white wine here? Because if there is then we should go to the next one.\u201d\r\n\r\nAt the galleries where beer is served everyone collects a can and, upon remembering they hate beer, pass each one to Christian. He puts them in his messenger bag and walks around with six open beer cans under the buckled canvas flap.\r\n\r\nAt eight o\u2019clock, after the wine is done being served, they usually go to a liquor store and dedicatedly continue to drink through the night. On every occasion that I have had the pleasure of being present, this has meant a night of cheap whiskey being poured into a plastic red cup with store-brand soda, someone vomiting in timely intervals for three hours, metal music by different bands that I virtually can\u2019t distinguish from one another blasting from a cheap iPod docking station, Christian drunkenly screaming at innocent passersby and urinating on something that is public property, Emma somehow calming him down, and Tony whispering \u201cEmma is a saint\u201d the whole way home.\r\n\r\nTypically there are some delightful surprises that come with a night spent with Steel Paradise drinking crew. Once a radio station promised to play one of their singles but played the song \u201cThis is Halloween\u201d from the soundtrack of some Tim Burton movie instead. Another night I entered a room to find Christian wearing women\u2019s Guns N\u2019 Roses leggings. One night, a night that I wasn\u2019t there, they found out that a recording studio liked their work and wanted to fly them out to California for a month to record an EP. I didn\u2019t get to witness it firsthand, but Moise says the excitement and celebration that night held can be measured in the sheer amount of things Christian pissed on that night.\r\n\r\n\u201cCalifornia was great,\u201d Moise confides in me. \u201cThere was this restaurant there. Oh man, I would fly all the way back to California just for the hamburgers at that restaurant.\u201d\r\n\r\nFrom what I understand, Steel Paradise had a very wonderful experience in California, but I couldn\u2019t elicit much from Moise, or anyone else for that matter, other than two subjects that he was very, very passionate about that he dabbled in quite a bit during the trip to California: the food and the weed.\r\n\r\nAnd, oh, how they love to talk about the weed. \u201cCalifornia...is a different way of life,\u201d Christian says, reclined on a musty couch in an apartment that belongs to some poor soul who got suckered into hosting thirteen kids looking for somewhere to smoke after a metal show. He goes on to explain things very specifically, such as accessibility societal acceptance, and drug culture, but he does so in such an aimless, unacademic, ridiculous and nonsensical way that it\u2019s not even worth noting. He closes his eyes, and then, losing track of what he was talking about, mutters again, \u201cCalifornia was really different.\u201d\r\n\r\nTony sits at a table nearby with some of the Art Girls from LaGuardia. They\u2019re fumbling with some sort of vaporizer that was legally purchased online from a site with some statement about only endorsing the use of legal aromatherapy as though they don\u2019t know who their audience are. Two of the art girls are piecing the contraption together, attaching some sort of nozzle and sliding batteries into it. \u201cThere\u2019s really no need for this,\u201d Tony is telling them, \u201cWeston and I once smoked out of a bell pepper and it worked fine.\u201d\r\n\r\nAmerica\u2019s real engineers are not at Princeton.\r\n\r\nIn accordance with their views on marijuana, the Steel Paradise group is also, for the most part, unified by their liberal social and political views. Much of the Steel Paradise group advocates queer rights and feminism, and most all members, like in any Manhattan-based group, identify with either the Democratic Party or some sort of liberal party. \u201cBen and I are basically socialists,\u201d Tony explains to me as we sit on the bus stop. Ben is Steel Paradise\u2019s bassist. He grows visibly frustrated and his tone changes as a thought passes over him. \u201cIt\u2019s just Christian who\u2019s the problem.\u201d\r\n\r\nChristian, Tony explains, \u201cthinks he\u2019s a Republican just because he believes in God.\u201d Tony grows visibly upset as he delves further into the subject. \u201cAnd I\u2019ve tried telling him, \u2018Christian, you play rock music. You don\u2019t hate gay people. You don\u2019t hate black people. You like smoking weed, you aren\u2019t a Republican.\u2019\u201d Impressed at this Official List of Qualities that, according to Tony Gorta, invalidate a Republican identity, I nod my head wordlessly. \u201cI think hopefully Emma\u2019s gonna change him,\u201d Tony confides in me. \u201cShe\u2019s liberal; she goes to art school for Christ\u2019s sake.\u201d I nod my head again, taking in this Official Qualification for a liberal identity. There is a silence invaded only by the sound of passing cars and then, as I expected him to, Tony gratefully mutters, \u201cEmma is a saint.\u201d\r\n\r\nDespite the fact that going to art school isn\u2019t quite directly <\/i>correlated with identifying in a liberal way, liberal viewpoints are certainly common in artists and art students, and a good portion of the Steel Paradise community are artists and art students. Often too, it seems, that the community is a place where eccentrics and misfits often fit in. Having the connecting factor of interest in the same musical genre opens opportunity to participate in an assortment of events on a regular basis, and the opportunity to meet other people in the group.\r\n\r\nRegardless of whether or not they agree with liberal views, the group seems to be deeply rooted not in a shared belief, but in a familial, communal sort of way. Despite the differences within the subculture, it seems as though they are all ready and willing to support each other. \u201cThese are just really open and accepting people,\u201d Tony tells me. \u201cThere\u2019s a lot of support between friends here.\u201d\r\n\r\nAnd he\u2019s right, the community has provided a support system for a lot of people who have felt otherwise lost when times are bleak. As in any group of people, there have been tragedies faced by participants throughout the years, and they are always met with an overwhelming show of compassion and sympathy. Most recently, Vironika, the lead singer of Steel Paradise, suffered the loss of her older brother. All of the band members shed their ridiculous garments on November 6th to attend the wake and support her.\r\n\r\n\u201cVironika is like a sister to me,\u201d Moise tells me, sincerely. \u201cThere\u2019s nothing I wouldn\u2019t do for her.\u201d\r\n\r\nThe band is currently on hiatus until Vironika feels ready to come back. In the meantime, Tony is currently working on a new logo design for the band, and the other members are looking forward to the release of more music, maybe even a full album. The band will continue to hold practices once per week once their lead singer is well enough to return, and hopes to continue performing local shows.\r\n\r\n\u201cThe group is still going to see each other even if there aren\u2019t any shows,\u201d Tony says, now walking along the edge of the sidewalk, Doc Martens scuffing against the cement. \u201cIt\u2019s not like we aren\u2019t friends outside of band [functions].\u201d\r\n\r\nAs I finally get ready to say my goodbyes and take myself home, Tony gives me a quizzical look.\r\n\r\n\u201cIt\u2019s dark out. I\u2019m taking you home,\u201d he says, plainly. I can\u2019t help but laugh at the tall, scary metalhead that will pay the extra fare to make sure a girl gets home safe at eight o\u2019clock on a Tuesday night. Gladly accepting his offer, I consent to hearing about how Emma is a saint and a tentative list of things Christian has pissed on for another thirty minutes.\r\n

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